**Mia's POV**
I had been training my entire life for it.
The entire palace, my home, had been in an uproar in preparation. Only a week out from my birthday, and already it had felt as if the excitement of it all lived on within me, like electrical currents just beneath my skin. One week until my eighteenth birthday, one week until the great gala that would be held so that I might find my mate and take my mother's throne, and I was so sure of everything.
It was not often that women sat on a throne. In fact, my mother was only the second queen in our kingdom's entire history - the first only because of her king-husband's death, until her son's eighteenth birthday. As for my mother, being the eldest born child with no brothers had secured her the family crown. For me, it was being an only child. The whispers of discontent amongst the other kingdoms and people still living in a past dictated by the choices of men and men alone were there, sure, but my mother had been a good queen in her own right for five years before she'd ever met my father. She had assured me that they would come around, that they would all see my strength and accept me in time. Get through the gala, get through the coronation, and show them what I was capable of - it was a simple enough plan.
For seven days, it felt like nothing could stop me. Nothing could steal away my confidence, my joy, my assurance that everything I had always been promised and prepared for would come to pass. I would lead my kingdom with empathy and strategy and kindness. I would be the leader my mother had raised and trained me to be. My mother, the Alpha Queen, had brushed all concerns and rumors away... And I had blindly believed her.
Looking back on all that has happened since then, I wonder if my mother had known. I wonder if she had seen me, her only child, and done everything she could to protect me, not knowing she was leaving me so underprepared for what was to come. I wonder if she'd heard any secrets swirling around about the possibility of our attack. I try not to think too much about it these days, but when I am alone late at night it hits me sometimes - her eyes, in those last moments. The way that she had screamed at me to go, to run. The way I had heard her fighting, her grunts of pain, her screams... And then silence, the loss of a life given to save my own. When I go to sleep, I see her eyes.
I always see her.
—
The ground was hard against my frame, sending small pains up my hips and side. How long had it been now? The sun was high in the sky again after I'd pushed so long last night to ensure I was not anywhere I might be found while I caught up on some much needed rest. I had been trained, of course, as all the royals were but... I was a princess. I was a future queen. I had been, at least. I had been spoiled, so much so that now the callouses and pains from pushing myself so hard the last few days were proof enough that I was so terribly underprepared.
My wolf, Niylah, was flittering between anger and sadness so intensely it was almost unbearable. That first night, the only thing that had kept either of us on our feet as the emotions whipped through us was fear. The sounds of what had occurred pushed us forward. The memory of my mother's eyes, my mother's life. I knew the moment she'd died. The moment the silence hit, Niylah howled in my head, but my feet ran on autopilot, the chill of my mother's last instruction still pushing my body even when I thought I couldn't go anymore, couldn't push myself any further. When the air choked in my throat and the fire that burned my chest felt like it would consume me, that was what kept me running. "Go!" A command, her last Alpha command. Her death took away the power it had hit me with, but not the emotional hold it had over me. She told me to run, and we did.
When it was safe, I had curled up in unfamiliar woods under thick, dark underbrush, hidden myself away in the wilderness, and sobbed myself to sleep. I couldn't tell how long ago that had been now, but the weight of what I'd put my body through was so evident as I forced my aching limbs to stretch, to stand, to assess my form. Everything was sore, hurting. Every part of my body was screaming to collapse back, to not have to get up.
The gown I wore was beautiful once. Now, tattered and ripped so as not to hold me back, it seemed almost like a long lost memory of even seeing it that first time, of what it was supposed to have meant. How ironic to be wearing it now, on this day. I can still remember slipping it on before everything that had transpired yesterday. One last fitting, one last opportunity for adjustments, so that today - or, rather, what today should have been - could be perfect.
Today. The common sounds of the woods, the sun pressing down upon the tops of the trees, served as a reminder of what today was. My eighteenth birthday, the day my gala and formal announcement was supposed to occur. My hair, clothes, skin were all covered in dirt and grime and sweat, and if I could have cried any more I would have. My entire life had prepared for this day, for this dress, for what had been planned for tonight - but a lifetime of planning to take over rule from my mother was not enough to prepare me for the night before.
Nothing could have prepared me for the windows shattering inwards, for the masked men who fell inside from above like rain, for the echo of laughter I could still hear in the back of my head if I thought too hard about it. Nothing could have prepared me for the grenade that had been thrown in, for the bright flash and the partial loss of hearing, for the smell of blood and my mother's screams. Nothing could have prepared me to lose everything in what had to have been less than thirty minutes.
Thirty minutes. The loss of my mother's life, of what my life had been, boiled to under half an hour. An attack had been made on my life, had taken so many of our palace staff's lives without reason, had taken my father's life first, and then my mother's. All to get to me. All to stop me from being the next queen of a kingdom my family had ruled for generations. It still didn't add up in my mind, still didn't make any sense. How had they known about the fitting? How had they known that so many of our warriors and guards would be in a special meeting in preparation for the gala? How had they gotten inside? There were so many holes I could not fill, so many thoughts I couldn't sort or get through...
The sound of a twig breaking under someone's foot sent me on high alert, crouching low and transforming my right fist into a fierce claw at will with the help of my wolf, my light blue eyes growing into a dark grey before taking on a golden hue as Niylah's power combined with my own. I peered out, into the unknown, ready to attack. I was ready to fight for my life if I had to. I would not let my mother down. All too familiar laughter found my ears and the sinking feeling in my stomach did a somersault before sinking even lower.
"Did you think to hide, Little Princess?" Once, this voice was a comfort to me. But after last night, after hearing that laughter following my mother's eternal silence, I felt anything but. "You always did love to play hide and seek." He was toying with me, stepping closer to my hiding space. I could hear him sniff the air. I swear I could almost see his perfect smile. "I always found you, Mia."
He was taunting me. Taking a scrap of the dress that had been on the ground, I tied my long blonde hair out of my face in an instant, moving slightly to throw a twig just to the left of me, so that I might distract him. He took the bait, two steps in that direction, letting me see his face through the thick greenery I was hidden behind.
I had thought him my mate once. His skin was perfectly tanned from days spent outside near the water, his sandy blonde hair bleached lighter and lighter during the Summer months, his eyes the lightest shades of green and honey that I had ever seen. It wasn't until that moment, looking at him now as a predator, that I understood why so many claimed Lucifer as the most beautiful of all the angels. I had thought Landon Price holy once, but now I saw him as a demon. I saw him as a traitor. I saw him as a threat. I saw him for what he was and always had been.
When I jumped out of my hiding space, eyes fully golden and wolf form taking completely over before I closed my teeth around his neck, I could almost swear there was amusement in his shock, pride in his surprise. Even when I knew he knew he was dying, it was almost like he was just glad that I had finally won for once. I had wanted him to catch me back then, wanted to be sought and found and smiled at by the man I dreamt up a life with. Now, I just wanted his laughter to stop. I just wanted his silence.
And then, when I had it, I realized it still wasn't enough.
